Blessed is The Storm

Roll with the storm, take it in, take it all in
The wreck has taken down the captives
No more will they feel the sea
Rain plauges their faces to hide the tears
Only salt remains to desinguish
To serve as reminder
You can't breath under water.

Throw down you burdens, nothing will save you
The pressure is building, serving no purpose
It's hard to relax when you can't breath
The sirens are singing songs to your grave
Black water consumes all that you gave
Reach for the sun, conquer the storm

Everyone is holding on.
We are waiting on the surface
Just like it was before
With a valid purpose

The waves are now crashing
The reef is aproaching
Divert your course from jagged demise
Spilt blood means nothing without valid cause
Pull yourself out from underneath this tide.

Forever seeking the destroyer

Her fingers spell decay written in hot breath on the back window of a strangers car. How much farther can this go before we careen off this bridge... I have found a path, and I found it in a way that I never wanted to. With that said my life has taken a new turn, and with THAT said I am going to do something with my life and get you back. end.

blame it on the times

When you look at the stars what do you see?
I see you, I see a classic flashback of all the things that we have shared. I see the way you hold yourself against me when it's cold outside. I see the way you look at me after I kissed you for the first time and you knew I meant it when I told you I loved you. I see the way you hold my hand and all the butterflies never seem to go away. I see the first time I had set eyes on you in over a month and my heart jumped. I see how much I miss you when I can't see you everyday. I see how jealous I become when you mention "him".
The stars shine so bright for you. Just so I can remember. Just so I can keep you close to my heart. Keep you in my pocket and wear the rest of me on my sleeve. There is somethng different about you that I can't just go and replace. Something that means more than the rest. I tried to run, for your sake, and I ran right back into your arms. I am Jack's mended heart.






I am so scared these days... no, not scared...horrified... Scared that there is someone with a cleaner plate than me. How can I convince you when i wear such tattered clothes? He's so clean, so pressed, flawless to a perfection... I am playing it safe, better not to talk about it and bring up my insecurities, my jealousy. My stomache hurts everytime you say ya'll kissed. My head throbs when I hear he was in your bed. How can I react to that? Honestly.... I want to beat the everliving out of him... no matter what else is said. But i wont...cant... its not my place, and will never be...





I love you... end

insecurity under the lines of solitude

If these walls could talk, I wouldn't listen. How can you take life so seriously? There is so much out there, so many things... accomplishments that I want to achieve. Why is it that you have to have a "real job" and the things you love have to be a hobby? Since when is that anything that has ever had a standard set to it? Why do I have to set myself to the standards that are expected of me? Since when does a steady job consist of something that I cannot stand. Why is that so commonly accepted. I have never been able to make myself try 100% with something I cannot stand, I simply will not do it. I know who I am, I know what I want. Why is it so hard for others to support a decision that I, myself make? Why must I follow the paths that have been so carefully cut for me by my parents, grandparents, family... Is that really what I need to do? NO!!!! I will not break my back for something I don't believe in any longer.

``` No longer will he form to fit the mold. Destiny becons closer, breathing hot down his neck as he walks. Not unlike the rest, he knows what but grows tired as the fight continues on. Hope is nearly lost, but still... there is something underneath the surface. Glowing warm with satisfaction and desire. Something great and powerful, you will see....

I sail these seas of empty streets pondering the world.
The souls fire is gone with the shadows of age.
Where is there hope?
Only brush now lives, occupying any crevace of the bricks.
The roads now haunted only with lifelessness.
The life that once exsisted now has moved on to greater things.
Past does not matter when future calls.


Cant think anymore.. done for the day

The

This is where I say I've had enough. Enough of the "usual" routine that I have so comfortably traveled. I need some spice, for the spices I have tasted recently have left such a bitter taste on the back of my tounge. The masks that have seen my face are discarded with the change of the wind.
I want to be polished and proper, but my shine is in a different light. I can't tell you how many times I have sat here thinking the same things. How many countless nights I have sat outside watching the stars with a cigarette in hand wondering where this story is going. My concentration has decieved me for the last time. I want to doubt no one. How can I trust something that isn't there?
I am in a room of mirrors that reflect nothing. The only thing that I seem capable of seeing are the lights of the carnival blurred with flash of a two dollar camera. Do you remember the cold?
Turn the headlights off baby, lets get lost and stay there. Just lay intwined here, don't get discovered. I rambled and you ran.
I lost myself in this moment and it lost itself to me. How have I become so doubtful of something this sure in itself? I can no longer explain my fears to the ones who have nothing. They hear me but do not understand. I need a confermation of my actions, a reciept for the transactions that have been stolen from me.
I know what I want, an idea, a clue. The bitter pill I swallow calms my nerves only to a point. Are you ready? I am.
I stuff my pockets so full of the "what I wants" for fear that I will never return.
Is it possible to undergo this open heart surgery with no remanence of the scars in my chest? Can I really pull this off? I feel like I'm skydiving without a parachute hoping you'll be there to soften my fall. Can I count on you? Or will it undermine me like so many things have done before? I don't want answers only results. Am I sick, or is it you? Are there lies hiding in my memories? I am afraid to ask for fear that if I poke and prod long enough the lies where I find my truth will simply dissapear without warning, leaving me lost once again. Why do I keep asking this question? I don't want what I am going to hear but in my stupidity I continue to plunge.